self-understanding

The Ways We Lie

There’s a scene in the movie Something’s Gotta Give that simply and succinctly captures one reality about the truth. After catching the man she loves on a date with another woman, Diane Keaton is chased out of the restaurant by a guilty and distraught Jack Nicholson. When he finally stops her, he pleads, “I have… Read more »

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Why It Is Good For You to Feel Negative Emotions

How can we best deal with our day-to-day emotional reactions? What can we do when our partner lets us down, when we have a struggle with our child, or when we feel provoked by a friend? Oddly enough, the first piece of advice is to stay with the pain. It turns out we expend much… Read more »

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The Emotional Life of Students: An Interview with Dr. Daniel Zamir

Student counselor, Dr. Daniel Zamir, draws upon his experience working at UCLA’s counseling center and discusses common issues university students seek to address. He touches upon a variety of key topics, including  relationships, anxiety, body image, depression, sexual identity, and stress reduction. [SlideDeck2 id=13141]

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Self-Esteem vs. Narcissism

As a culture, we are highly concerned with self-esteem. And this is a good thing. How we feel about ourselves determines how we treat those around us and vice versa. In 1890, William James identified self-esteem as a fundamental human need, no less essential for survival than emotions such as anger and fear. And yet,… Read more »

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A New Look at Differentiation

Remaining undifferentiated renders one unable to fully accept the gift of life and, instead, leaves one merely living out the life of another. The Self Under Siege I believe a fundamental question for people to consider is whose life are they living? Are they pursuing the things that really light them up, that matter to… Read more »

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Addicted to Doomed Relationships?

If we were asked, as an exercise, to craft a personal ad detailing what we want in a partner, it may read something like: Seeking someone who is kind and patient, independent yet loving, laid back, yet energetic. Someone who is confident but isn’t afraid to laugh at him/herself. Someone attractive but down to earth…. Read more »

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The Anti-Self Vs. The True Self

For a long time we’ve speculated the falling economy could mean a rise in the suicide rate, and now, new research has given us some indication. In April, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention issued a release stating the overall suicide rate rises and falls in connection with the economy. This conclusion was drawn from… Read more »

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What is Mindsight? An Interview with Dr. Dan Siegel

In the following interview, Dr. Dan Siegel discusses and defines the fundamental theory of Mindsight as a way to focus the mind on the nature of the internal world. These exclusive video clips are part of a featured interview series with Dr. Dan Siegel, an expert in the theory of Mindsight, an empowering action-oriented way… Read more »

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Laugh it Up: Why Laughing Brings Us Closer Together

Having the last laugh may be more important than you think…literally. New research reveals that the physical act of laughing can actually elevate an individual’s pain threshold. Whether you’re rolling on the ground in stitches over the latest YouTube video with friends, politely chuckling at your uncle’s knock-knock joke, or laughing nervously at your boss’… Read more »

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Understanding Our Style of Relating When Triggered

When we are triggered emotionally, it can all feel sort of choiceless; like we have lost control of ourselves. Even if we have the awareness of our reaction, it is difficult to stop our emotional response, because the nervous system, the brain, the memory centers are all interacting. Our learned style of relating Most often… Read more »

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