self-understanding

Being Alone: The Pros and Cons of Time Alone

Some people naturally prefer time alone and that can be fine. Roughly 50% of the population can be categorized as introverts, meaning they get the most value in life out of time spent on their own.  Being alone can offer a rich psychological experience, but too much isolation can have a negative impact on both… Read more »

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Building Self-Esteem

Millions of people suffer from low self-esteem. They walk around each day questioning themselves. They wonder if they are attractive enough, smart enough, successful enough. They constantly worry about what other people think of them, when the truth is that they are their own harshest critics. Self-esteem is defined as having “confidence in one’s own… Read more »

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How to Befriend Yourself: A Psychotherapeutic Approach to Living

In addition to training and experience, the ideal attitude of the therapist toward the client would best be described by the following adjectives: honest, direct, interested, inquisitive, warm, compassionate, non-judgmental, understanding and deeply feeling. In actuality, a person can learn to develop many of these same points of view towards him or herself. People can utilize… Read more »

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Understanding Cell Phone Addiction

I wake in the middle of the night and instinctively reach for my phone. I innocently tell myself that I just need to check the time. It’s still dark out and I will surely go back to sleep, but as soon as the iPhone is in my hand, muscle-memory takes over. Before I know it,… Read more »

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Empathy: How It Can Help Us All Right Now

In the aftermath of the most contentious election in recent history, many people are talking about the need for empathy in order to heal our divided nation. Facebook posts are flying around that charge us to rise above the rancor and offer empathy to those with whom we disagree. Just recently, Meryl Streep spoke to… Read more »

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The Many Benefits Of Self-Compassion

Our sense of self is often a divided thing. Most of us have a side in us that is “on our own team.” It encourages and supports us. It helps us fight for what we want and believes in what we can achieve. However, there is often an opposite force in each of us that… Read more »

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Trust Issues: Why Is It So Hard for Some People to Trust?

It is mutual trust, even more than mutual interest that holds human associations together.                                                                           ~ H. L. Menken… Read more »

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How to Find Your Happiness

We’ve all seen some version of this scene: the child at the playground, covered in ice cream, wearing a tiara. She’s surrounded by fun toys, fawning parents and other happily screaming kids. Yet, although her world appears to be exactly as she’d want it, she is beside herself sobbing in utter distress. My point here… Read more »

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The Ways We Lie

There’s a scene in the movie Something’s Gotta Give that simply and succinctly captures one reality about the truth. After catching the man she loves on a date with another woman, Diane Keaton is chased out of the restaurant by a guilty and distraught Jack Nicholson. When he finally stops her, he pleads, “I have… Read more »

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Why It Is Good For You to Feel Negative Emotions

How can we best deal with our day-to-day emotional reactions? What can we do when our partner lets us down, when we have a struggle with our child, or when we feel provoked by a friend? Oddly enough, the first piece of advice is to stay with the pain. It turns out we expend much… Read more »

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