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In my last blog, I described the “voice” as a series of negative thoughts and attitudes toward self and others, which are at the core of a person’s self-destructive ideology and behavior. As such, the voice can be conceived of ...

Discover the negative thoughts and attitudes at the core of a person’s maladaptation. The voice consists of a series of negative thoughts and attitudes toward oneself and others that is at the core of a person’s maladaptation. It can be ...

The short answer is: yes! Hating yourself puts you directly at odds with someone who loves you. You each have diametrically opposed points of view about you: your’s being negative and your partner’s being positive. So what can you do ...

Recently, I wrote about “Living with an Accidental Identity.” I described how painful early experiences, definitions, and defenses affect the way individuals perceive and present themselves throughout their lives, leading them to develop an “accidental identity,” rather than a true sense of ...

There’s a nasty defense mechanism that undermines and sabotages your efforts to have love in your life: your critical inner voice. It comes at you from all sides; it goes after you, it badmouths your partner, it slams your relationship, ...

The term “self-consciousness” doesn’t sound so bad when broken down. After all, being conscious of oneself is something we all need in order to operate as social beings in a social world. However, self-consciousness often describes an exaggerated focus or ...

In any given lifetime, a person can be many things, often, to many people. We are parents, partners, sons or daughters, siblings, best friends, bosses, and co-workers. The many shoes we fill can spread us fairly thin. At times, the very ...

“That the birds of worry and care fly over your head, this you cannot change, but that they build nests in your hair, this you can prevent.” – Chinese Proverb For many of us, worry can feel like an uncontrollable force ...

“We are all failures – at least the best of us are.” – J.M. Barrie No matter how “successful” a person may seem, we all have moments of feeling like a failure. When things feel smooth at work, we pick apart our ...

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