Parenting

Facing Into the Rough Winds of a Challenging Time

For a sapling to emerge as a stable and sturdy tree, it establishes a deep root system and a thick trunk. From there, growth takes time and support. It must withstand environmental stressors, competition for water, nutrients, winds and other adversities. In the forest, a canopy provided by the more mature trees shelter the small… Read more »

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Parenting During Times of Stress

With more schools and offices closing each day due to the COVID-19 pandemic, most parents are finding themselves at home with their kids around the clock. And while it is necessary for our physical health to practice social distancing or sheltering in place during this strange time, it is likely to take a toll on… Read more »

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Is This More Than the Baby Blues?

I have yet to meet a mother, or any parent for that matter, who has described the experience of becoming a parent as easy or exactly what they expected. Bringing a new child into the world, whether it is your first or your fifth, is big adjustment and can bring up feelings that are often… Read more »

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Skiing – A Metaphor for Emotional Regulation

When we enter the world, we transition from an insulated environment to one that is full of challenges.  We must learn how to navigate around both expected and unexpected events. It is a journey that is easier for some and more difficult for others.  As adults, it can be easy to overlook the process our… Read more »

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How Do Adverse Childhood Events Impact Us?

…And can positive childhood events provide protection? In the 1980s, Dr. Vincent Felitti, a physician from Kaiser Permanente was running an obesity clinic through the Department of Preventive Medicine. After several years, much to Felitti’s puzzlement, more than half of the people participating had dropped out despite successfully losing weight. Determined to find out why,… Read more »

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Mr. Rogers is Right: Secure Attachment Allows for Growth After Trauma

Childhood is a critical time for discovering and enhancing the secure attachment ideally built in the early years of a parental relationship with a child. Our earliest relationships do a great deal to establish our sense of self and wellbeing. Knowing, “I matter, my needs matter, and my loved ones will help keep me safe”… Read more »

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The Myth of a Perfect Mother

This Mother’s Day was the 40th one that I have celebrated as a mother. And it has occurred to me that I have earned the right to answer the question: “What piece of advice would you offer about being a mother?”  I used to think that only perfect mothers were qualified to speak on this… Read more »

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What Kids Really Need from Their Parents

Being a parent comes with a lot of pressure to do right by our kids. But boiled down to specific, daily decisions, this pursuit also comes with a lot of confusion. It’s easy to get caught up in the checklists of items that we hope will benefit our children: special classes, programs, and parenting methodologies…. Read more »

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5 Ways Working on Ourselves Can Benefit Our Kids

 “Don’t worry that children never listen to you; worry that they are always watching you.” – Robert Fulghum A lot of people marvel at how parenting has changed over the years. Some mock how it’s become so much more hands-on and child-centered. “We grew up like wild dogs in the ‘60s,” joked Jerry Seinfeld in a recent stand-up routine. “No helmets,… Read more »

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Three Principles to Raise Free and Happy Kids

As parents, it’s safe to say that our number one goal is to make our children feel safe and loved. However, there is a lot of gray area and disagreement about what approach to parenting accomplishes this goal. Does good parenting mean staying by your kids’ side every second, warning them of any potential danger… Read more »

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