Relationship Problems

How to Stop Feeling Triggered by Your Partner

In my last blog, I wrote about some of the psychological reasons we get triggered by our partner in a relationship. I explored why tensions can rise so quickly, and things can feel heated before either person has a chance to understand what’s going on. These conflicts can be fraught enough for some people to… Read more »

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Why Do We Trigger Each Other in Close Relationships?

3 important factors to help you understand why you’re triggered by your partner What is a fight between a couple but a series of triggers being set off one after the other? One person feels dismissed in a conversation and accuses the other of being superior. The other person fires back that they’re being dramatic…. Read more »

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Why Do We Keep Ending Up in the Same Kinds of Relationships? The Answer Lies in Our Attachment Styles

As I observe my single friends and family members navigating the dating world and looking for love, I keep hearing the same question: Why do I always end up in the same kind of relationship? “I started out feeling optimistic about this relationship, but then things fell apart like they always do, and the relationship… Read more »

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You May Be Wrong About Your Attachment Pattern

One of the most profound influences on the way we behave in relationships is our early attachment patterns. As children, the attachment patterns we formed were based on adaptations we made in order to feel secure in our environment. The ways we were cared for and related to by our parents or primary caretakers led… Read more »

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Why You Pick Fights with Your Partner… and How to Stop

 “I love you, so why do we fight so much?” This quandary is one that most couples face, leading them to question everything from their reality to their relationship to the rationality of love itself. After all, isn’t a certain amount of arguing normal? One recent survey found that couples argue an average of about… Read more »

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The Key to Healthy Communication

The other night at dinner, a man asked, “What do you suggest my girlfriend and I do to maintain good communication in our relationship?” What came to mind was all of the bad communication that I have observed between couples trying to have conversations with each other. And what struck me about all of these… Read more »

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3 Principles to Keep Love Alive

August is National Romance Awareness Month, and I am well aware that there are a gazillion blogs and unlimited advice out there about how to maintain romance in a relationship. Just google “keep romance alive” if you don’t believe me. And it’s really helpful advice: talk to each other, make time to be together, stay… Read more »

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Getting the Love You Want

Breaking patterns to achieve better relationships Two questions I’ve heard frequently in my 30-plus years working with clients are “Why do my attempts at relationships keep ending in failure?” and “Are my standards too high? No one I want seems to want me.” The truth is that we all have different internal struggles that get… Read more »

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Daring to Love: Interview with Tamsen Firestone

Watch Now: Daring to Love  Move Beyond Fear of Intimacy, Embrace Vulnerability, and Create Lasting Connection  

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Preserving Individuality to Strengthen Your Relationship

To maintain a successful relationship it is necessary that both people maintain their own individuality and respect the individuality of their partner. Each is concerned with their own and their partner’s continued development as a person. In my book, Daring to Love, I write about achieving this by remaining adult, open, undefended, and honest in… Read more »

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