Self-Destructive Behavior

The Destructive Ways We Self-Parent as Adults

The relationship we have with our parents or primary caretakers is almost never black or white. Some of us may be more inclined to idealize our parents, while others may feel especially zoomed in on their shortcomings. Most of us are guilty of both. As adults, we’re often better able to see that our parents… Read more »

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Why We Don’t See Ourselves Clearly

On any given day of our lives, our self-esteem is likely to hit plenty of peaks and valleys. One minute, we may feel confident and content, the next we may feel insecure and uneasy. As unsettling as this can be, it’s not uncommon. Our self-perception is often not based on what’s actually going on in… Read more »

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Are You Setting Yourself Up For Failure?

It’s now February and nearly two months into our New Year’s Resolutions for 2020. So how are you doing with yours? Do you know that, according to the American Psychological Association, 93% of people set resolutions at the first of the year? And did you also know that research shows that by February, 45% of those… Read more »

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How Sick is “Sick Enough?”

10 pounds made the difference between actually living and simply surviving.   A year ago, I based my self-worth off the number describing the gravitational pull of my body toward the earth. I felt that my body’s natural hunger cues were signs of weakness.  I believed that if I could only run longer, see a gap… Read more »

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Addressing Suicide Risk in Trying Times

In April, a Global Emotions Report by Gallup showed that people worldwide are sadder, more afraid, and angrier than ever before. This news may not hit you as a surprise. The sense of heaviness in a recent talk about the state of the world is palpable. It seems every day we are struck by dire existential warnings,… Read more »

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How’s That Working for You?

Why are we so stubborn about changing certain patterns? “What would you say is your biggest weakness?” This is probably the most dreaded question in a standard job interview, in large part because it’s one we aren’t really expected to answer honestly. Instead, we’re supposed to guise the weakness as a strength. “I’m a perfectionist.”… Read more »

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The Inner Voice in Self-Destructive Behavior and Suicide

Suicide is a tragic ending to life that, in many cases, can be averted. It constitutes a public health problem of considerable magnitude in the United States, occurring at nearly twice the rate as that of homicide.  From 1999 to 2016, suicide rates have steadily risen in nearly every state in the union. Understanding this seemingly perverse anti-life behavior… Read more »

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6 Major Influences that Stop You from Becoming Your True Self

To be nobody but yourself in a world that is doing its best, day and night, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting. ~ e.e. cummings Each individual faces a struggle against powerful odds to retain a unique selfhood and personal… Read more »

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Understanding Self-Harming Behavior: Healing with Self-Care and Compassion

The phrase “self-harming behavior” may call up images of troubled teenagers with cuts on their arms. But self-injury can occur for people of any age, in children, adolescents and adults, whether male or female. People who self-harm or cut are people who are in pain. We have to notice that.  The important thing is to… Read more »

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Compulsive Liars: The Truth About Lying

“You’re a despicable liar!” These words, shouted by my 11-year-old cousin, John, were etched into my mind some forty years ago. Not because they stung, but because I was so struck by John’s impressive use of the word “despicable,” and the dramatic flair with which he hurled it at me. I distinctly remember that I… Read more »

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