self-understanding

A New Look at Differentiation

Remaining undifferentiated renders one unable to fully accept the gift of life and, instead, leaves one merely living out the life of another. The Self Under Siege I believe a fundamental question for people to consider is whose life are they living? Are they pursuing the things that really light them up, that matter to… Read more »

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Addicted to Doomed Relationships?

If we were asked, as an exercise, to craft a personal ad detailing what we want in a partner, it may read something like: Seeking someone who is kind and patient, independent yet loving, laid back, yet energetic. Someone who is confident but isn’t afraid to laugh at him/herself. Someone attractive but down to earth…. Read more »

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The Anti-Self Vs. The True Self

For a long time we’ve speculated the falling economy could mean a rise in the suicide rate, and now, new research has given us some indication. In April, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention issued a release stating the overall suicide rate rises and falls in connection with the economy. This conclusion was drawn from… Read more »

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What is Mindsight? An Interview with Dr. Dan Siegel

In the following interview, Dr. Dan Siegel discusses and defines the fundamental theory of Mindsight as a way to focus the mind on the nature of the internal world. These exclusive video clips are part of a featured interview series with Dr. Dan Siegel, an expert in the theory of Mindsight, an empowering action-oriented way… Read more »

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Laugh it Up: Why Laughing Brings Us Closer Together

Having the last laugh may be more important than you think…literally. New research reveals that the physical act of laughing can actually elevate an individual’s pain threshold. Whether you’re rolling on the ground in stitches over the latest YouTube video with friends, politely chuckling at your uncle’s knock-knock joke, or laughing nervously at your boss’… Read more »

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Understanding Our Style of Relating When Triggered

When we are triggered emotionally, it can all feel sort of choiceless; like we have lost control of ourselves. Even if we have the awareness of our reaction, it is difficult to stop our emotional response, because the nervous system, the brain, the memory centers are all interacting. Our learned style of relating Most often… Read more »

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The Joy of Sadness

Upon exploring my psychological issues rather late in life I discovered something entirely unforeseen: that while I had been unconsciously avoiding feeling “sad” my entire life this emotion was not only satisfying but a key to who I really am. I had until then said my goal in life was to be “happy”. After this… Read more »

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Dr. Pat Love Defines Four Basic Keys to Loving

Dr. Pat Love describes four basic actions to take that constitute a concrete offering of love and can, therefore, dramatically improve a couple relationship: There are really four things, let me just tell you, four things that every baby needs, every child needs, every adult needs.  It’s just basic to homo sapiens, to the human… Read more »

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What’s Really Keeping You Out of Your Swimsuit This Year

The 4th of July weekend carried a strange theme for me this year. It started when I was driving my 10-year-old niece home from a family pool party and she asked me, puzzled, “Why do so many people hate the way they look?” I realized that she was referring to comments she’d overheard while happily… Read more »

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A Definition Of Loving with Dr. Pat Love

In an exclusive interview with PsychAlive, Dr. Pat Love explains and defines the unique paradigm that is Love. It’s interesting that you ask what my definition of love is, because before research I would have said, “Love is a response to getting your needs met.”  Because if you look in the Western literature, it basically… Read more »

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