>Suddenly, through birthing a daughter, a woman finds herself face to face not only with an infant, a little girl, a woman-to-be, but also with her own unresolved conflicts from the past and her hopes and dreams for the future…. As though experiencing an earthquake, mothers of daughters may find their lives shifted, their deep feelings unearthed, the balance struck in all relationships once again off kilter. ~Elizabeth Debold and Idelisse Malave, Authors Mother Daughter Revolution.
When you weigh the many factors that influence a mother-daughter relationship, it’s no wonder communication can be a point of tension. At different ages daughters will trigger different reactions in their mothers. For instance, a mother who feels like she is good friends with her 10-year-old may find that she has a much harder time communicating with her daughter once she turns 13. A variety of factors can play a part in this connection or lack of connection, as parents tend to project their own experiences on their children, particularly those of the same sex. For mothers, learning how to talk to their daughters can be a great step toward allowing them to feel seen and heard – not as an extension of themselves but as independent people with her own experiences. In a new book by Dr. Deborah Tannen, You’re Wearing What?, the author explores mother-daughter communication. Here you can read an interview with the author on “Mothers & daughters: How to talk to each other.”
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