 |
Evicting The “Obnoxious Roommate” Living in Your Head by Lisa Firestone, Ph.D.
I scanned the sea of black-robed 20-somethings for my sister’s familiar face. As I glanced over each aisle, I noted the beaming expressions of the satisfied graduate students about to receive their Masters degrees in Journalism. When I finally caught a glimpse of my sister, I was glad to see that in spite of the 100 degree heat and jumbled instructions on the ceremony, she possessed the same calm and contented look as those around her.
I couldn’t help but think just how different this look was from the one she was sporting only weeks ago, when she was stressing over her workload and uttering all-too-familiar phrases of her student life such as: I’m not going to get everything done. I’m doing a horrible job. They hate my thesis. My grades are going to be terrible. I’m never going to get a job. Yet, in that moment, poised to receive her diploma, she felt her self-attacks subside, as her attitude shifted from “I can’t do it” to “I did it.”
I didn’t have long to ponder this transition, before the dean welcomed the honorary speaker, Arianna Huffington, to the stage. Within minutes, I watched Arianna’s dynamic and honest manner of speaking literally lift the flock of students a little higher in their folding chairs. But what struck me most in her speech was when she introduced her ambitious audience to the idea that each one of us has an “obnoxious roommate” living in our heads. This “roommate” is there to hold us back and tell us we are not good enough to succeed. Arianna explained how with every step forward, we should be wary of our obnoxious roommate, as it tends to become even more obnoxious, putting us down and warning us of potential failure.
Click here to continue
 Dr. Lisa Firestone, PhD, is the Director of Research and Education for The Glendon Association. Since 1987, she has been involved in clinical training and applied research in suicide and violence. In collaboration with Dr. Robert Firestone, her studies resulted in the development of the Firestone Assessment of Self-Destructive Thoughts (FAST) and the Firestone Assessment of Violent Thoughts (FAVT). Dr. Firestone has published numerous professional articles, and most recently was the co-author of the books: Sex and Love in Intimate Relationships (APA Books, 2006),Conquer Your Critical Inner Voice(New Harbinger, 2002), and Creating a Life of Meaning and Compassion: The Wisdom of Psychotherapy (APA Books, 2003).
Books by this Author:
Leave a Reply
|
|
|
|
 |
|
 |
