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Changing Your Sense of Identity

Recently, I wrote about “Living with an Accidental Identity.” I described how painful early experiences, definitions, and defenses affect the way individuals perceive and present themselves throughout their lives, leading them to develop an “accidental identity,” rather than a true sense of ...

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The Unselfish Art of Prioritizing Yourself

prioritizing yourself

Taking care of ourselves and doing what we love is NOT selfish Most of us are taught from an early age that being selfless is a good thing. There are many benefits of altruism to both our mental and physical well-being. However, ...

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Self-Consciousness: How to Reduce Self-Consciousness

Self-consciousness

The term “self-consciousness” doesn’t sound so bad when broken down. After all, being conscious of oneself is something we all need in order to operate as social beings in a social world. However, self-consciousness often describes an exaggerated focus or ...

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Take Control of Who You Are in Your Relationship

I often speak to people who are in distress over the way their romantic partner treats them. They believe that they want to be close, but that their partner is preventing it by being “condescending”, “critical,” “irresponsible,” “distant,” or “rejecting.” This makes ...

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Feeling Like a Failure

feeling like a failure

“We are all failures – at least the best of us are.” – J.M. Barrie No matter how “successful” a person may seem, we all have moments of feeling like a failure. When things feel smooth at work, we pick apart our ...

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What Goes On in the Mind of Your Therapist?

As you sit in your therapy session, sifting through your own thoughts, do you ever wonder what your therapist is feeling and thinking? When you open up and disclose so much of yourself to someone it’s impossible not to occasionally ...

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Self-Loathing

Self-loathing is that underlying feeling that we are just not good: not good enough, not good at this, not good at that, not good at – or for –much of anything.  It can be subtle, we may habitually compare ourselves ...

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