critical inner voice

Bad Mood: 10 Ways to Overcome a Bad Mood

We all have those times when the ground beneath us seems to shift. Something bubbles up from within, be it anger, annoyance, sadness, frustration, offense, or hurt, and our mood darkens like a storm cloud stretching over the sky. A bad mood can feel like a head cold, overcoming us and forcing us to sludge… Read more »

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Building Self-Esteem

Millions of people suffer from low self-esteem. They walk around each day questioning themselves. They wonder if they are attractive enough, smart enough, successful enough. They constantly worry about what other people think of them, when the truth is that they are their own harshest critics. Self-esteem is defined as having “confidence in one’s own… Read more »

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How to Be Confident

A Psychological Guide to Building More Self-Confidence Society offers us plenty of advice on how to be confident. “Just be yourself.” “Fake it til you make it.” “Dress for success.” Tips fly at us from every direction, from mothers to magazine covers. Some of this advice can be useful, but it can ultimately feel ineffective… Read more »

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How to Befriend Yourself: A Psychotherapeutic Approach to Living

In addition to training and experience, the ideal attitude of the therapist toward the client would best be described by the following adjectives: honest, direct, interested, inquisitive, warm, compassionate, non-judgmental, understanding and deeply feeling. In actuality, a person can learn to develop many of these same points of view towards him or herself. People can utilize… Read more »

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How to Get Over a Breakup

“Someday you’re gonna look back on this moment of your life as such a sweet time of grieving. You’ll see that you were in mourning and your heart was broken, but your life was changing…” ― Elizabeth Gilbert No matter what their specific circumstances, breakups take a very real emotional toll. Like any loss, there’s no… Read more »

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How to Reduce Self-Criticism and Make Real Change

My biggest problem with New Year’s resolutions is that, too often, they’re grounded in self-criticism. And by self-criticism, I do not mean a positive or realistic aspiration to be a better human being. What I’m referring to is a deep, dark core belief that we are just not good enough. For many of us, this… Read more »

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Letting Go of Your Inner Critic, an Unwelcome Holiday Guest

This time of year, our sentiments are filled with wishes of joy, happiness, love, and light. Yet, for so many people, the holiday season is not the picture of warm serenity we see printed on our greeting cards. In fact, a majority of people name winter as the most stressful season of the year. Last… Read more »

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You Don’t Really Know Yourself

Examining the persistence of our negative identity My life’s work has focused on understanding resistance in psychotherapy and more specifically, on people’s fundamental resistance to the formation of a better, more positive image of themselves.  For the most part, they are unaware that their lives are controlled and regulated by negative images and attitudes toward… Read more »

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The Many Benefits Of Self-Compassion

Our sense of self is often a divided thing. Most of us have a side in us that is “on our own team.” It encourages and supports us. It helps us fight for what we want and believes in what we can achieve. However, there is often an opposite force in each of us that… Read more »

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I Hate My Body: Dealing with Poor Body Image

In the age of selfies and social media, we hear a lot about the rise of narcissism in modern society. Yet, with this increased importance placed on appearance, we need equally worry about the epidemic of poor body image. A survey by Glamour Magazine found that 97 percent of women questioned had an “I hate… Read more »

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