…elf-worth. The Humanistic Psychologist, 45(3), 238-257. Karen Bluth & Kristin D. Neff (2018) New frontiers in understanding the benefits of self-compassion, Self and Identity, 17:6, 605-608 https://www.health.harvard.edu/mental-health/4-ways-to-boost-your-self-compassion…
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…ined in EMDR and Narrative Exposure Therapy, with expertise working with acute and chronic PTSD and other trauma related disorders. Jordan is an adjunct clinician at Children’s Hospital Los Angeles, providing trainings, consultations, and community education on identity and adolescent development. Jordan sits on multiple Board of Directors, serving the LGBTQ+ community nationally. Jordan has worked extensively in secondary school education, develo…
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…xplore the root causes of our pain. When we deal with our core emotions, we no longer need to waste our energy seeking escape. Part of how we do this involves making sense of and feeling the pain of our story, which helps us to peel away the negative overlays of our past and separate from the identity prescribed to us that further fuels addictive behaviors. We can practice self-compassion and refuse to side with our critical inner voice. Each of t…
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…oment, can mean shaking the very groundwork on which we built our sense of identity and allowing ourselves to see the real, often painful, roots of this internal enemy. The point of recognizing and labeling our inner critic in the moment is not to pretend we are perfect or to refuse to acknowledge our flaws and shortcomings. Rather, it is an exercise in separating who we really are and who we’d like to be from a cruel, distorted filter that tells…
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…mmortality projects – our children, our careers, our religious or national identity – and suppressing the certain knowledge that our time is short. Perhaps, if we accepted and felt this truth, we would arrange our lives differently. We might seek out only the most meaningful experiences, spend time on projects that matter to our deepest hearts, give kindness and be tender to the people we love. We might decide to focus on what matters most to each…
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…t relationships to work throughout our lives, and they inform our sense of identity. If we feel safe, soothed, and seen by our parents or caretakers, we’ll form a secure attachment to them. However, when our parents are unable to attune to us and repair ruptures in the relationship, we will form an insecure attachment pattern. The patterns of insecure attachment in childhood are anxious-ambivalent attachment, anxious-avoidant attachment, and disor…
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…ing a meaningful life involves envisioning goals that express one’s unique identity and interests and then taking the actions necessary to realize these goals in the real world. The ability to imagine, to conceptualize something new, and to plan for the future are uniquely human traits. Out of the potential for inventiveness and imagination comes achievement, aesthetic and innovative pursuits, and material success. Developing the ability to concep…
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…allay those feelings, a baby develops an illusion of connection or merged identity with their parent. This imagination provides the baby with partial gratification of their emotional and physical needs, easing their anxiety and soothing their distress. In other words, the fantasy bond serves as a substitute for love and care at those times when it is missing in the infant’s early environment. The fantasy bond is reinforced during those times when…
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…tions “like everybody else.” It’s hard to untangle one’s trauma from one’s identity. That’s the complex piece. What causes CPTSD? Complex trauma comes from a history of living with abuse or neglect from those who were supposed to protect and maintain your safety. It changes the way you view life. It can leave an imprint on your nervous system (which is why a bottom-up approach to therapy is so important). With complex trauma, you were not taken ca…
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…knowledged and acknowledging of her full self, her physicality, and her wants. Failing to recognize or repressing this part of ourselves can have serious consequences. Every person must feel they can accept themselves and their whole identity. If you are cut off from such an essential feeling, you become less alive and less you. That is why it is so important to debunk the myths about a women’s sexuality and allow every individual to live freely a…
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