Search Results for: critical inner voice

The Voice (The Enemy Within)

…n’t trust her,” “He will always lie to you,” “Men are just mean.” Critical inner voices are often experienced as a running commentary that interprets interactions and events in ways that cause considerable pain and distress. The voice defines situations in critical, pessimistic terms based largely on past events. It is analogous to a lens or filter that casts a gloomy light on the world which, in turn, has a profound negative effect on our mood an…

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Is Fear of Emotion Driving Our Addiction?

…ice of a destructive inner coach, a thought process known as the “critical inner voice.” This “voice” can be the fuel for addictive behavior, first encouraging us to use or indulge, then punishing us for our behavior. “Just have a drink,” it beckons, “You deserve a good time. You work so hard. You need to let go and relax.” Then, once we’ve indulged, it screams, “You failure! How could you mess up again? You’ll always be a loser.” This luring, the…

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Stop Hating Yourself Once and For All

…us in every area of our lives, making up what we refer to as our “critical inner voice.” We can even pass these “voices” down to future generations. Where this inner critic comes from, why it exists and what we can do about it are the subjects of our book Conquer Your Critical Inner Voice and of my Webinar “Stop Hating Yourself: A Method to Overcome Your Inner Critic.” Here, I will briefly outline the cause and effects of these self-hating thought…

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I Hate My Life

…when we feel like we hate our lives is “are we listening to our “critical inner voice?” As Maddi discovered in his research, it isn’t just our circumstances that determine our life satisfaction and success. In fact, it’s what we are telling ourselves about our circumstances that often makes us miserable. Our critical inner voice describes a cruel, internal enemy we all have inside us that comments on our every move and criticizes us at every turn…

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Stop Procrastinating

…y procrastinator can take. By learning about the inner critic or “critical inner voice” that leads to procrastination, we can take on this enemy, and start accomplishing our goals. Why is it so hard to stop procrastinating? We all possess what psychologist Robert Firestone describes as a “critical inner voice.” This “voice” is like a mean coach, critiquing our performance, questioning our abilities and encouraging us to stray from our goals. Peopl…

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Defense Mechanisms

…eo games,” wrote Dr. Lisa Firestone, who co-authored Conquer Your Critical Inner Voice with Robert Firestone. “As an adult, it can mean becoming anti-social, avoiding goal-driven behaviors, or abusing substances like alcohol. Our defense mechanisms may influence us to engage in self-soothing rituals or to avoid perceived dangers.” Defense Mechanisms in Adulthood As adults, catching on to our defenses can be challenging. We all cut off from emotion…

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Stop Self-Sabotage by Conquering Your Inner Critic

…about our (my and my father Dr. Robert Firestone’s) work on the “critical inner voice.” The host started the show by talking about all the media attention on terrorism and the fear we, as a nation, were feeling following the attacks of 9/11. She ended her introduction by saying, “But what if the worst enemy we face is the one residing inside ourselves, the critical inner voice?” I found her statements compelling. Throughout our lives, we often ac…

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Silence the Inner Voice That’s Stressing You Out

…high, we often set ourselves up to later become a target for our critical inner voice. We start to have self-critical thoughts like: What is wrong with you? You never give 100 percent to anything. Can’t you just get one thing right? You’re such a failure! Even when times are tough or the pressure being placed on us is external, we can seek out an inner sense of calm by quieting those inner voices that exacerbate the problem. This is not meant to…

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How to Be Confident

…ur Inner Critic Dr. Robert Firestone, author of Overcoming the Destructive Inner Voice has written extensively about the role of the “critical inner voice” in injuring people’s confidence and limiting their ability to fully be themselves. This “voice” is like a sadistic coach that attacks us from every angle and undermines our goals. It affects us in all areas of our lives. Sometimes, this destructive thought process can seem subtle, even soothing…

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How Standing Up for Yourself Helps You Fight Depression

…ne of the most important things to consider is the effect of the “critical inner voice.” The critical inner voice represents a damaging internal thought process, a form of destructive self-talk that perpetuates feelings of shame, self-hatred, negative rumination, and low self-esteem. Studies have shown that low self-esteem predicts depression. Even in toddlers, a negative self-concept has been found to be associated with depression. Although, most…

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