…e patterns, we must gain an understanding of the defenses we formed as children that once helped us deal with hardships but now hold a negative influence on our lives. For instance, if someone grew up with a negligent parent, they may have an inner voice that tells them, “You are fine on our own. You don’t need anybody.” This thought may have made them feel secure when they were young, but as an adult they may not trust easily and actually push aw…
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…d lead to a real and lasting relationship. Instead, they may be based on a draw toward fantasy, a false sense of being completed, or an innate desire to merge one’s identity with another (returning to the safety of the womb). They can also be based on emotional hunger toward a partner, or the illusion of getting safety and immortality through “love” and walking off into the sunset together forever. So why are we drawn to fantasy over reality when…
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…her. Unfortunately, this is not the case for many — or most — women. As Hendrika Freud emphasized, “Generally speaking, the bond between mothers and daughters facilitates passing on emotional health as well as pathology to the next generation.” It’s these two opposing ways of identifying with our mothers that cause us distress. We easily identify with and imitate our mother’s positive qualities and point of view about life, but the problem is that…
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…ncluding suicidality and persistent mood disorders. Jordan is trained in EMDR and Narrative Exposure Therapy, with expertise working with acute and chronic PTSD and other trauma related disorders. Jordan is an adjunct clinician at Children’s Hospital Los Angeles, providing trainings, consultations, and community education on identity and adolescent development. Jordan sits on multiple Board of Directors, serving the LGBTQ+ community nationally. Jo…
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