Search Results for: lisa firestone/feed/2009/11/fear-of-intimacy

Are you Parenting Like Your Parent?

…e, negative traits in our parents, especially those that caused us misery, fear and frustration, can also linger in our psyche and impact our behavior. This is especially the case in present moments of stress that somehow remind us of our past and manage to set off old triggers in us. As you may imagine, scenarios that are reminiscent of our childhood are increasingly likely to arise when we ourselves become parents. We may not really remember how…

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A Female Call To Arms! Be Yourself

…ing the make-up off for a day here-or-there, by not holding in our stomach fearing that some guy is looking, by surrendering to being our real selves, we open to the extremely heady feeling that women go wild for, a fortified female identity that tells a woman she is free to “just be” herself. You can’t get more Sex in the City self-confident than that. Acting in Stepford Wives kinds of ways by minimizing ourselves while going overboard to stroke…

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“I don’t know”, “I don’t remember”, “I didn’t do it” – Opportunities to Teach Responsibility

…“What happened?” if the tone strikes them as harsh, accusatory or if they fear the consequences. Often we as parents get strident in our tone, because we are scared (like when someone is hurt) or angry (like when something gets broken). After all, who volunteers to face an inquisition! Our first step is to manage safety and then to manage our tone. A neutral tone is more likely to invite a response than one that is fearful or critical. Once we ha…

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To Listen to a Child

…development, but of the calming effect they can have by reacting intelligently and sensitively to their child. A parent can cause lasting psychological problems by imparting their own anxiety, fear and frustration onto their child in times of stress. This book teaches parents a healthy way to respond to your child’s natural discomforts, wants and needs….

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Preventing Teen Suicide

…de sometime during the past year. These statistics are alarming and arouse fear and concern in everyone. However, many suicides can be prevented if young people and those closest to them became familiar with and learn how to respond to the danger signs of a suicidal crisis, both in themselves and in their friends and family members. Parents, teens, friends and family, teachers, counselors, and survivors — people who have lost someone to suicide –…

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The Problem with Overpraising Children

…stop wanting to try. They may hold back, because they feel like a phony or fear that they will fail. 3. Life will be a disappointment Parents often make sacrifices in hopes of giving their children the best. Sometimes this is done to an extreme, and the parent’s life starts to center solely around the child. When we cater to a child’s every desire and treat them as royalty, we fail to reflect the real world they will enter as adults. Our willingne…

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How to talk with kids about the economic crisis

…tension or agitation regardless of the smile you glue on your face or the fears you try to hide behind closed doors. They become upset and worried, but because they are being overlooked, they feel that whatever’s happening is none of their business. Therefore, they have no one to talk to about what they are thinking and what they are feeling. So remember, just because kids can’t understand a situation, doesn’t mean that they aren’t affected by it…

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VIDEO: Dr. Peter Levine Case Example of Somatic Experiencing Approach for PTSD

…, there was a fire-fight, friends were killed. This whole experience — the fear, the terror, the boredom, and then the explosion — this all gets together. But if you’re locked like this, there’s nowhere you can go. You have to help the person get out of the shock. Then, they can begin to start processing the emotional stuff. So this whole defensive response, like mine in the car accident, got locked into his body and as we teased that apart, in th…

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prescription drug abuse, addiction

Is Our Aversion To Pain Killing Us?

…and often, for much of her days. As she wrote down and acknowledged these fears, she began to deal with them on a conscious and “feeling” level. Alleviating her fear of the anxiety in itself helped this woman to take control of her sleep disorder. Through dedication and bravery, she was able to overcome a problem that had plagued her for decades. This is not to say that carefully used and professionally monitored medications are not of value. It…

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VIDEO: Dr. Peter Levine on Somatic Experiencing Approach and Titration

…a pigeon, a bird, and hold it in your hands and restrain it, even without fear, it stops fighting, it stops moving. And if the animal is frightened, it stays in longer and longer.So I started again doing more research and I’m sure that that image came from that graduate seminar because I realized that she was feeling immobile, and was feeling terrified and that this image of escape came clearly from what animals do after they’ve been in this immo…

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