Search Results for: critical%20inner%20voice

The Problem with Shopping for Relationships Online

…You can take more risks while being more mindful. 4. Do NOT Listen to Your Critical Inner Voice Sadly, in direct correlation with its ability to connect us with more people, online dating also gives us the ability to disconnect. Most people who’ve dated online know what it’s like to get excited about someone, only to have them stop chatting, texting, or calling, often without any explanation. This type of indirect, insensitive behavior can set you…

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6 Major Influences that Stop You from Becoming Your True Self

…degrees, by an incorporated thought process which I have identified as the Critical Inner Voice, that is disparaging, hostile and, at its worst, self-destructive. In this blog, I focus primarily on six major influences that impinge upon the evolving self, contribute to psychological distress, and interfere with differentiation and individuation – the project of becoming a person. These include (1) negative prenatal influences, (2) aversive family…

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Why It’s Okay to Feel Bad About Certain Things

…I’ve centered my research and practice on understanding and challenging a “critical inner voice” we all possess that is way too hard on us. While acting on this “voice” is something we should always strive to avoid, there are times when it’s okay to feel bad about our actions. We are all human, and we are all flawed, but the way we grow emotionally and as a human being is, in part, through recognizing when we have acted badly and feeling the accom…

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5 Ways to Rewrite Your Breakup Story and Feel Better

…ath forward. We can start by doing the following: 1. Pay attention to your critical inner voice. Each person has a “critical inner voice,” a side of themselves that is turned against them and their circumstances. This “voice” frequently becomes intense after a breakup, twisting a person’s experience through a distorted filter. For example, it can put the person down with thoughts like, “She hates you. You’re worthless without her.” It can make the…

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How to Let People Help You

…de us that keep people at a distance. We can start by paying attention to “critical inner voices” that fuel our feelings of discomfort and avoidance around accepting. We can try to be aware of the negative thoughts that come up when we’re on the receiving end of a kindness or acknowledgement. We may notice a range of thoughts that minimize, critique, or deny us like, “I didn’t really do anything special.” “I don’t need any help.” “This is my burde…

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trauma covid-19 isolation

Dealing With Today’s Trauma

…ten suffer from feelings of failure. When we are overwhelmed and down, our critical inner voices often flare up and have a lot to say. Because the situations are different than usual, our voice attacks are different from the ones we are used to. In relation to the longer amount of time you are spending alone, you may have these voices: No one misses you. They don’t care about you. No one loves you. About your new work conditions: You’re failing at…

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Why We Must Keep Nurturing Connection

…lect. Other times, a more destructive force is at play. Most of us have a “critical inner voice” that coaches us and lures us into self-limiting behavior. This “voice” is often its loudest when we’re alone, so that’s where it likes us to be. It can sound like a sadistic bully, chiming in with thoughts like, “Just keep to yourself. That person doesn’t really want to see you.” Other times, it may even sound soothing, feeding us thoughts like, “Why d…

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how to accept compliments

The Importance of Accepting Compliments

…cism, and promote mental, physical, and emotional health. When we are self-critical, she explains, our stress level goes up. This “floods our system with adrenaline and cortisol. And it’s a double whammy because when we criticize ourselves, we are both the attacker and the attacked. This type of chronic stress can eventually lead to anxiety and depression, undermining our physical and emotional wellbeing.” She reminds us that our inner critic is a…

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The Effects of Honesty, Empathy, and Higher Order Thinking on Moral Development

…han guidance, advice, rules or prescriptions for living. That is why it is critical for parents and adults to identify and change negative personality traits within themselves that they do not want to pass on to their children. They must strive to be mature and consistent in their attitudes and conduct, and resist regressing into bad moods or childish behaviors (such as being irresponsible, self-indulgent or victimized). In terms of moral developm…

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Video: Dr. John Norcross on the methodology of Psychotherapy – Relationships that Work.

…re some people who are more internalizers, or intra-punitive, or very self-critical. So, the prototype here would be, for example, a very self-critical, internalizing adolescent woman, who might be quite depressed and anxious. On the other side of the coping spectrum are the externalizers, the extra-punitive, the acting out. Again, the prototype that most people think about is a 12 year old, aggressive, ADHD boy. Well, we’ve known about this, we h…

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