“If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail” – Abraham Maslow Seeking out the assistance of a therapist is a desperate and courageous act. Typically, for a parent, it means they have tried and failed to help their child behave, so they have friends, get along with siblings and family members,… Read more »Learn More
Debra Kessler, Psy.D.
Blogs by Debra Kessler, Psy.D.
The matter of siblings is complicated. In family life they are our first peers. Consequently, we learn many of our problem solving skills and intimate social relating from these interactions and how our parents mediate them. There are millions of conflicts a week: Johnny breaks Suzie’s toy, Suzie calls Johnny a name, Johnny doesn’t want… Read more »Learn More
As loving parents, we want the best for our kids. If we can afford it, we take our children to the orthodontist to correct their teeth, so they have a beautiful smile and keep their teeth to old age. I find this to be a helpful metaphor for learning challenges. Learning challenges are unseen “misalignments”… Read more »Learn More
Many times in my office parents say their goal is for their child to be happy. As a therapist, I have to wonder if being happy is really what we want? When are our children happy? When they get a birthday present; get a cookie they wanted; win at a game. If life consisted of… Read more »Learn More
My daughter and I were watching videotapes of her when she was little. At 17 years of age, she likes to laugh at herself revisiting times when she was small and still trying things she has since learned she is not good at, such as singing and dancing. In one of the tapes when she… Read more »Learn More
For the holidays I gave a Nerf gun to my 8-year -old nephew. He was delighted. It was his first Nerf gun. He took great joy in taking aim at the window, door or any place where he was allowed to shoot. It was the first time I saw genuine spontaneous pleasure cross his otherwise… Read more »Learn More