Search Results for: critical inner voice

What Is Your Role in Your Relationship?

…d others to achieve what they “should.” This is often done in a driven and critical way that can feel controlling. The aim of both individuals, rather, should be to be proactive and self-assertive in their own lives and goals, thinking ahead and going after what they want. Defensive and angry vs. rigid and righteous: A parental partner can be closed off to other points of view, defensive, or even punishing when they receive feedback. They may coun…

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The Effects of Honesty, Empathy, and Higher Order Thinking on Moral Development

…han guidance, advice, rules or prescriptions for living. That is why it is critical for parents and adults to identify and change negative personality traits within themselves that they do not want to pass on to their children. They must strive to be mature and consistent in their attitudes and conduct, and resist regressing into bad moods or childish behaviors (such as being irresponsible, self-indulgent or victimized). In terms of moral developm…

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Are You Living with an Accidental Identity?

…that is turned against us. The language of this anti-self is our critical inner voice, defining us in judgmental and self-critical ways, and encouraging us to engage in behavior that limits us, sabotages our goals, and is self-destructive. Our sense of identity isn’t only shaped by these early interactions with our caretakers, but also by the defenses we form to cope with emotional pain and distress. Three important factors contribute to this dis…

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Why Some Men Give Up Their Identity in a Relationship

…t. However, if that relationship is more strained or the mother has a more critical view of her son or of men in general, the son often internalizes these attitudes toward himself. In addition, if he had a father who seemed weak-willed, emotionally vacant/distant, or too critical and punishing, or if he had no father figure at all, he may struggle with his own identity and the concept or expectations surrounding masculinity. While I’m not personal…

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Is Being Proud of Your Kids Really about You?

…e is that it can come off as pressure. As parents, we can be demanding and critical or praising and prideful, but both sides of the coin can have the same effect; they can make our child feel pressured and disconnected from their own undertakings and accomplishments. Children may feel they have to achieve in order to win their parent’s love. They may feel the added pressure of the parent’s own expectations and how they reflect on their parent. Par…

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Relationship Advice from Relationship Expert Dr. Lisa Firestone

…We asked relationship expert Dr. Lisa Firestone for her advice on everything from how to make love last to how to get over a devastating break-up. Watch her answers below. YouTube responded with an error: The playlist identified with the request’s <code>playlistId</code> parameter cannot be found….

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Negative Feelings, Essential Signals on the Road of Life: Supporting our Children on their Path

…ections. That is why it is so painful in the teen years when fitting is of critical importance. Embarrassment means they acted in a way that was out of the social norm, raising the alarm that they need to reconsider their future actions to be socially acceptable. Guilt, on the other hand, lets them know they have violated their own sense of morality. The distress of this negative emotion prompts apology and repair when we hurt or offend someone. T…

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VIDEO: Dr. Allan Schore on Effective Suicide Prevention and Early Attachment

…l of the sciences. So essentially, we’re looking at early, you know, early critical period – the new pieces that we’re also looking in – not only early development, but early critical period development of the brain itself. That means therefore, that abuse and neglect in the first year is much more severe (in terms of affect) than in the ninth year. I mean, if it’s in the first year when the right brain is setting up, then it’s going to alter the…

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The Societal Obsession with Selfies (and What’s Wrong With It)

…At the age of 15, Bowman became obsessed with his looks after people made critical comments about his appearance on Facebook. He resorted to dieting, to skipping classes so that he could take selfies without being interrupted, and then dropped out of school completely. In his obsession, he did not leave his home for six months where he would spend 10 hours a day taking up to 200 selfies. After failing to capture “the perfect selfie” he became so…

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VIDEO: Dr. Kirk Schneider – The Transformative Power of Awe

…eally, took away a sense of security. KS: Absolutely. And again, it’s that critical point between the possibility to come into the more of one’s own being, or the alternative of either total collapse or some tremendous defense against the unknown, the unpredictable. And I think one of the main differences between the two is that if people are able to come into the awesomeness of the experience more, there’s usually somebody there who has helped th…

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