Search Results for: Dr. Lisa Firestone Gender Stereotyping

Five Ways to Bring Your Vacation Romance Home

…elationship. This mode of imagined relating is what psychologist Robert W. Firestone, refers to as a “fantasy bond.” A fantasy bond represents a fused identity as a couple that replaces the initial excitement and mutual respect we once felt as two individuals who loved and cared for each other. When we give up our individuality for the security of imagining that we are part of a couple, we lose the attraction we once felt toward each other. By let…

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Parents and Self-esteem

Your Child’s Self Esteem Starts With You

…ize for our mistakes, empathize with their pain, and explain to them how we really feel. The more honest, open, and mindful we make the environment we share with our children, the more we enable our children to be resilient and to move confidently and independently into the world.  …

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The Critical Inner Voice

Evicting the "Obnoxious Roommate" In Your Head

…the parallels between Arianna’s inspiring message and my father’s, Robert Firestone, and my own 30 years of research into the concept of the “critical inner voice.” Like the “obnoxious roommate” described by Arianna, the inner voice represents an internalized critic that we all possess to varying degrees. Although this isn’t an actual voice we hear, the critical inner voice describes destructive thoughts we all experience toward ourselves, as if…

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Sabotage You

…ritical Inner Voice, a concept generated by my father, psychologist Robert Firestone, is formed early in life during stressful and traumatic events. Just as positive childhood experiences lead to confidence, ability and optimism, negative experiences lead us to low self-esteem, self-destructive behaviors and pessimism. The Critical Inner Voice thus describes a dynamic operating within each of us that causes us to relive rather than live our life….

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The Real Reason You’re Not Married

…ays we hurt our relationship is by distorting our partners. The flaws that drive us away from a loved one don’t just appear the minute we move in or say “I do.” They were there from the beginning when we weren’t as likely to blow them out of proportion. Yes, it is true, that often the closer we get to someone, the more driven we become to push them away. This is also a side-effect of a fear of intimacy lingering below the surface and warning us no…

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How To Tell the Difference Between Real Love and Fantasy

…al and exciting from the deadening effects of what my father, psychologist Dr. Robert Firestone, termed “The Fantasy Bond?” A fantasy bond is created when two people replace real acts of genuine love, admiration, passion, and respect with the role and ritual of “being” in a relationship. Though this process is often unconscious, people can begin to recognize patterns and behaviors characterized by a Fantasy Bond that are destructive to their close…

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How to Bring "Vacation Sex" Home With You

…sex” hotter and more exciting than what most couples experience in their bedrooms at home? And more importantly, why can’t they have that kind of sex in their everyday lives? One of the answers often given is that people are more relaxed on vacation; they’ve left work and responsibilities behind. They have the opportunity to unplug their computers and cell phones so they won’t be distracted. They are there with the purpose of having a good time, s…

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perfect imperfect moment

3 Steps to Experience the Perfect Imperfect Moment

…y silence this critic. As one of the leaders in interpersonal neurobiology Dr. Daniel Siegel says, the only appropriate attitude to have toward yourself is to be curious, open, accepting and loving. This attitude is what makes change possible. It’s what helps you to not only reach your goals but enjoy and appreciate the road that gets you there, imperfect as it may be. 2. Don’t Avoid Feelings My father, who is also a psychologist and my co-author…

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5 Achievable Resolutions for a Longer, Happier Life

…y expert Dr. Daniel Siegel and co-founder of the NeuroLeadership Institute Dr. David Rock developed The Healthy Mind Platter, a regimen that consists of “seven daily essential mental activities to optimize brain matter and create well-being.” One of these activities involves “physical time,” in which people move their bodies aerobically in order to strengthen the brain. Exercise doesn’t just make us stronger physically, but mentally as well. Aerob…

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