communication

How to Stop Feeling Triggered by Your Partner

In my last blog, I wrote about some of the psychological reasons we get triggered by our partner in a relationship. I explored why tensions can rise so quickly, and things can feel heated before either person has a chance to understand what’s going on. These conflicts can be fraught enough for some people to… Read more »

Learn More

How To Create Healthy Boundaries That Work for You

You have an important deadline at work. But you had to take your car to the shop. You skip breakfast and catch a ride to work. By noon your stomach is churning. On your way to lunch, your boss stops you to take care of something urgent. What do you do? We depend on our… Read more »

Learn More

How to Fall Back in Love with Your Partner

It’s perfectly normal to have times when you feel more or less in love with your partner. Yet, it’s painful to have lulls in a relationship that leave you feeling hopeless or questioning its future. At these times, even if you have lists of issues you know are causing problems with your partner, it can… Read more »

Learn More

Top 10 Effective Communication Techniques for Couples

Good communication skills are the keys to any successful relationship because relationships are emotional and rely on interpersonal verbal and nonverbal exchanges between the two people involved.  Most marriages start out with the idea of success not realizing the number one cause of divorce is bad communication.  In cases of parenting and co-parenting, communication is… Read more »

Learn More

Self-Consciousness: How to Reduce Self-Consciousness

The term “self-consciousness” doesn’t sound so bad when broken down. After all, being conscious of oneself is something we all need in order to operate as social beings in a social world. However, self-consciousness often describes an exaggerated focus or uncomfortable attitude we have about ourselves and how we are perceived. The problem with self-consciousness… Read more »

Learn More

Take Control of Who You Are in Your Relationship

I often speak to people who are in distress over the way their romantic partner treats them. They believe that they want to be close, but that their partner is preventing it by being “condescending”, “critical,” “irresponsible,” “distant,” or “rejecting.” This makes them feel terrible or forces them to take control, demand attention, or stand up for themselves. They… Read more »

Learn More

It’s Time to Talk about Mental Health

“Your feelings aren’t that important.” “No one cares how you feel.” “Just forget about it.” “Bury your emotions.” “Keep a stiff upper lip.” “There’s no point in being sad.” “What’s wrong with you anyway?” “Be strong.” “Keep calm and carry on.” These are just a small sample of the thoughts that emerge from a choir… Read more »

Learn More

Empathy: How It Can Help Us All Right Now

In the aftermath of the most contentious election in recent history, many people are talking about the need for empathy in order to heal our divided nation. Facebook posts are flying around that charge us to rise above the rancor and offer empathy to those with whom we disagree. Just recently, Meryl Streep spoke to… Read more »

Learn More

How to Say What You Want in Your Relationship

In my 30 years working with couples, I’ve noticed that most people have an easy time describing what they don’t want in their relationship. If prompted, they’re able to rapidly fire off the many issues that they feel are creating distance between them and their partner. Yet, if I ask the same people what they… Read more »

Learn More

Do You Have an Honest Relationship?

For all the great things we say about being honest – that it’s the best policy or that the truth shall set us free – research tells us that we aren’t all that great at it. According to studies by Dr. Bella DePaulo, people lie in one in five of their interactions. These lies aren’t only to… Read more »

Learn More