anxiety and relationships

Why Relationships Scare Us

“Love takes off masks that we fear we cannot live without and know that we cannot live within.” – James Arthur Baldwin The pursuit of love is a great motivator of mankind. Love is universal in that it’s something most of us strive for; it’s part of what gives our lives meaning. Yet, we all… Read more »

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Can We Change in Our Relationships?

It’s possible to break free of bad habits when it comes to relationships. “Can a person really change?” This is a question I hear a lot when people are talking about struggles in their relationships. They wonder if their partner will ever start being more romantic or stop getting in such bad moods. It’s easy… Read more »

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How to Deal with Jealousy

No one enjoys feeling jealous. Yet, jealousy is an inevitable emotion that pretty much every one of us will experience. The problem with jealousy isn’t that it comes up from time to time, but what it does to us when we don’t get a hold on it.  It can be frightening to experience what happens… Read more »

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Just Be Kind: The Only Relationship Advice You’ll Ever Need

You may already be rolling your eyes at the vast oversimplification of this title… and if you were to go back to read the many articles I’ve written on relationships, you’d know that I don’t think the secret to romantic success can be boiled down to one simple piece of advice. However, if people ask… Read more »

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Getting Over Relationship Insecurity

“She isn’t attracted to me anymore. She never acts as excited to see me when I come home. Why can’t it just be like it was in the beginning?” My friend has just entered into the first of two common phases of relationship insecurity: rhetorical questioning. The internal investigation continues with, “She takes forever to… Read more »

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5 Things to Do Today to Save Your Relationship

What every couple should try before giving up on love The decline of a relationship is an awful thing to experience. More often than not, the process starts slowly, and we hardly notice little ways we may be pulling back or growing apart. Eventually, negative dynamics start to evolve, then persist for so long that… Read more »

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Are You Single for the Right Reasons?

There is nothing wrong with being single. In fact, one of the most important lessons someone can learn is that they can be a whole and happy person on their own. A failure to recognize this can drive people into relationships that don’t satisfy them or that even make them miserable. Moreover, when their decision… Read more »

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How to Deal with Relationship Anxiety

Relationships can be one of the most pleasurable things on the planet… but they can also be a breeding ground for anxious thoughts and feelings. Relationship anxiety can arise at pretty much any stage of courtship. For many single people, just the thought of being in a relationship can stir up stress. If and when… Read more »

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Why Do So Many People Respond Negatively to Being Loved?

Love — kindness, affection, sensitive attunement, respect, companionship — is not only difficult to find, but is even more challenging for many people to accept and tolerate.  In my work with individuals and couples, I have observed countless examples of people reacting angrily when loving responses were directed toward them. One man felt a flash… Read more »

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Real Love or a Fantasy Bond: The Appeal of the Twilight Saga

The latest Twilight movie “Breaking Dawn” is already breaking records. Young fans clamored and camped out on dirty sidewalks for hours (even days) to make it to Friday’s midnight premiere. Walking past one such line, I noticed a father dropping off a shrieking group of dressed up 15-year-old girls from a stretched hummer, rented just… Read more »

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