Fantasy Bond
A “fantasy bond” describes an illusion of connection between a couple that is substituted for feelings of real love and intimacy. Forming a fantasy bond is an often unconscious act of self-parenting and self-protection, in which two people become pseudo-independent, replacing the real relating involved in being in love with the form of being a “couple.” The degree of reliance on a fantasy bond is proportional to the degree of frustration and pain experienced in a person’s developmental years. In this section, you can learn why fantasy bonds are formed, what qualities make up a fantasy bond, and how to avoid falling into an unhealthy “bond” in your own relationships.
Stay in Love by Staying Out of Fantasy
There may now be hard science behind the notion that true love can last a... >>
Why Do So Many People Respond Negatively to Being Loved?
Love — kindness, affection, sensitive attunement, respect, companionship — is not only difficult to find,... >>
The Fantasy Bond: A substitute for a truly loving relationship
Defenses formed in childhood hurt adult relationships. Most people have fears of intimacy and are... >>
What Real Love Looks Like
Throughout our lives we compile a picture of what we think real love should look... >>
Why Domestic Violence Occurs and How to Stop It
October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month, and with domestic violence on the rise, it is... >>
Dr. Sheldon Solomon on the Fantasy Bond: Exclusive Interview
The following transcript contains part of an exclusive interview with Dr. Lisa Firestone and Dr.... >>
Breaking the Fantasy Bond with Our Mothers
The other day, I was reminded of reading Nancy Friday’s book, My Mother/My Self many... >>
Why My Relationship Failed, a Fantasy Bond Story
We’ve all been there. Sitting alone, upset, rejected, wondering, “what the... >>
What is a Fantasy Bond?
Dr. Robert Firestone on The Fantasy Bond
Dr. Lisa Firestone On The Fantasy Bond
Dr. Lisa Firestone on the Fantasy Bond