Fear of Intimacy

Where Does Our Love Go?

Its obituary has been announced internationally… in the plot of a thousand books, films, TV shows, articles and tabloids – the sad loss of the initial spark in a relationship. Disapproving wives on evening sitcoms make snide remarks at their lazy husbands. Movies depict failing marriages, worn by routine and destroyed over infidelities. The excitement… Read more »

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Deception and the Destruction of Your Relationship

When the topic of infidelity spills into our daily dose of media, we may say we saw it coming, or we may react with shock. Either way, we don’t exactly look away. Without even meaning to, we learn details, names, sources and suspicions. Most of us would admit that there is little point in speculating… Read more »

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The Real Reason You’re Not Married

Whether it’s those lurking peak wedding months or the daily talk of royal nuptials, marriage is a subject we’re hearing a lot about lately. Feelings about this trend seem to range from wild enthusiasm to mild resentment. Forgetting for a minute the adversity surrounding the institution of marriage and setting all ceremony aside, stripped down… Read more »

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Why You Keep Winding Up in the Same Relationship

If we were asked, as an exercise, to craft a personal ad detailing what we were looking for in a partner, it may read something like this: Seeking someone who is kind and patient, independent yet loving, laid back, yet energetic. Someone who is confident, but isn’t afraid to laugh at him- or herself. Someone… Read more »

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The Inner Voice that Undermines Your Relationship

Sometimes our criticisms of our partners and ourselves has less to do with reality and more to do with a self-critical set of standards imposed on us by an internal enemy. When attempting to understand what goes wrong in our relationships, it can feel as if we would have to wade through un-translated copies of… Read more »

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Seven Qualities of an Ideal Partner

Learn the qualities that make a person an ideal partner – They may not be what you expected. While the reasons we fall in love are often a mystery, the reasons we stay in love are far less elusive. There may be no such thing as the perfect partner, but an ideal partner can be… Read more »

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The Fear of Intimacy

Robert W. Firestone, Ph.D. and Joyce Catlett, M.A.  – The authors of this book bring almost 40 years of clinical experience to bear in challenging the usual ways of thinking about couples and families. They argue that relationships fail not for the commonly cited reasons, but because psychological defenses formed in childhood act as a… Read more »

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Communication Between Couples: How to Communicate in a Relationship

Most people have never learned how to communicate.  Without this skill, a person is handicapped in an intimate relationship.  Without being able to express themselves and listen to another, partners cannot achieve intimacy.  By developing your communication skills, you and your partner will be able to establish and preserve a loving, respectful relationship between two… Read more »

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Critical Inner Voice and Intimacy

Where your critical inner voice comes from As small children, we are helpless and entirely dependent on adults for nurturance and to have our needs met. It is impossible for even the most loving parent to anticipate and respond to all of the needs of an infant, therefore every child suffers from some degree of… Read more »

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Destructive Relationships

No matter what you do, do you keep ending up in the same type of relationship? Even when you think you are falling in love with a completely different kind of person, do they turn out being the same as all the others? Are you the victim of some kind of recurring bad luck or… Read more »

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