…lives meaning and direction without falling victim to the inner critic that holds us back and keeps us from achieving our goals. Learn more about Dr. Lisa Firestone’s latest book, The Self under Siege: A Therapeutic Model for Differentiation…
Learn More…A Presentation with Dr. Lisa Firestone Learn more about attachment style…
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…hat psychologist and Sex and Love in Intimate Relationships author, Robert Firestone calls a “fantasy bond.” A fantasy bond replaces real acts of love and affection toward your partner with an illusion of connection. In a fantasy bond, a couple may operate as a unit, seeing themselves as safely joined, yet their relating becomes a matter of form and routine. No longer do they show much passion, love or respect for each other. Instead, they relate…
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…o a “Fantasy Bond,” a term developed by psychologist and author Dr. Robert Firestone to describe an illusion of connection created between two people that helps alleviate their individual fears by forging a false sense of connection. A fantasy bond is toxic to a relationship because it replaces real feelings of love and support with a desire to fuse identities and operate as a unit. As the couple relates as a “we” instead of a “you” and “me,” thei…
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…ative approach to differentiation, a four-step process developed by Robert Firestone, Ph.D. involving: 1. Breaking with internalized thought processes, critical attitudes toward self & others. 2. Altering the negative personality traits in oneself that represent an incorporation of aversive traits of one’s parents 3. Identifying/relinquishing patterns of defense formed as an adaptation to painful events in childhood. 4. Developing one’s own values…
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…itic. We all have an inner critic, what my father, psychologist Dr. Robert Firestone, refers to as your “critical inner voice.” For people who are depressed, this critical inner voice can have a powerful and destructive influence on their state of mind. It may be feeding them a distorted commentary on their lives: You are too fat to leave the house. You are so stupid. No one will ever love you. You aren’t capable of being happy. You will never suc…
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…t so hard to stop procrastinating? We all possess what psychologist Robert Firestone describes as a “critical inner voice.” This “voice” is like a mean coach, critiquing our performance, questioning our abilities and encouraging us to stray from our goals. People who procrastinate tend to have a loud and active inner critic. They may hear self-hating thoughts like, “You won’t do it right, so why do it at all?” or “Don’t take a chance. You’ll never…
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…earn More 3) Fear of Intimacy As my father, psychologist and author Robert Firestone, wrote in his article “You Don’t Want What You Say You Want,” “Most of us profess that we want to find a loving partner, but the experience of real love disrupts fantasies of love that have served as a survival mechanism since early childhood… Pushing away and punishing the beloved acts to preserve one’s negative self-image and reduces anxiety.” Our fears surround…
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…Even though we all say we want love, there are many ways we protect ourselves by sabotaging our relationships. Dr. Lisa Firestone explores why and how we act out these destructive patterns with our partners….
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…following transcript contains part of an exclusive interview with Dr. Lisa Firestone and Dr. Christine Courtois. LF In working with people who have been violent, what do you think is the most important thing in terms of treatment just from your perspective? CC OK. Talking broadly I think, I would really want to look at their capacity for empathy and what I’ve found – and I don’t treat violent folks or perpetrators per se, but I think what’s absent…
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