Anger

Don’t Play the Victim Game

In Psychological Defenses in Everyday Life, (1989), I described a patient who complained that her husband was habitually late for dinner. Dinner was ready at 6:30, but he often came in as late as 8:30 without calling to let her know that he would be late. She asked me, “Is that right?” in a tone that… Read more »

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Exploring Anger: What It Is, What It Does, and When It’s Appropriate

It’s happened to everyone: that internal switch that gets flicked on without a moment’s notice and just like that… all you can see is red. For different people, anger manifests itself in many different forms, at different times and because of different triggers. There is no set equation for anger, no exact variables, and no… Read more »

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The Inner Voices Behind Violent Behavior

Too often, the subject of violence is addressed in our society from a platform of sensationalism, disgust, and trepidation. The reporting of violent events incites two reactions from viewers: horrified fascination or a repelled reflex to turn away. Neither reaction inclines us to seek a better understanding of why violence occurs, nor to ask the… Read more »

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How to stop yourself from "losing it" with your child

When it comes to parenting, perfection is an unrealistic goal. As much as we would all like to be emotionally attuned and sensitive to our children 100 percent of the time, even the best parents are prone to losing control and overreacting in times of stress. Many of us have witnessed or experienced the scene… Read more »

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Letting Go of Anger

Anger is a basic human emotion that everyone experiences. Learning to deal with one’s anger is an important lesson, as repressing it can have harmful effects, while unleashing it in an unhealthy manner can hurt you and those you care for. So how do we deal with our anger? What are some healthy forms of… Read more »

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Nerf Guns – What Are We Afraid of? by Debra Kessler, Psy.D.

For the holidays I gave a Nerf gun to my 8-year -old nephew. He was delighted. It was his first Nerf gun. He took great joy in taking aim at the window, door or any place where he was allowed to shoot. It was the first time I saw genuine spontaneous pleasure cross his otherwise… Read more »

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Understanding Anger

For most of us, anger can be an intimidating subject. On one level or another, anger causes everyone a certain amount of fear. We’re afraid of someone getting angry at us and we’re afraid when we feel angry at someone else. We are even troubled when we aren’t directly involved and are just observing two… Read more »

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